Before I was ever in school, I may have occasionally heard mild profanity every once in a blue moon. Little did I know that “crap” did not mean the same thing as “crab”. That is, until I told my dad that he was a real crap.

When I was younger I always thought people were saying tourists instead of terrorists. I thought it was really weird that tourists would want to attack the World Trade Center.

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Up until fifth grade, I thought that the word “straight” was synonymous with “virgin”.

Nikolas sends in this story about not wanting to be a farmer.

When I was younger I showed an interest in chemistry and my Dad told me to become a pharmacist. I had recently visited a petting zoo and didn’t like the smell so I told him there is no farm I would want to assist.

Another quick hit from the anonymous bin:

When I was younger, In Church we would always pray to stop Euthanasia. I always wondered what the youth in Asia were up to that was so bad.

I’m sure most of us can relate to this experience by a Mysterious Stranger:

When I was a kid I thought that Hall & Oats was Haulin’ Oats. I assumed they were a country band that sang about farming.

I know I pretty much thought the same thing at one point.

Katlyn mangles some dwarves and freaks out her mother:

When I was a very little girl my parents were going through a divorce and I was experiencing what it was like to have a split family, living with my mother and visiting my father on weekends..

Many times my dad would take me to the movie theaters just to spend quality time and I’d go home and tell my mom about it..

On this particular occasion I arrived home very excited to fill my mom in, I looked at her with a cheesy grin she tells me, and said “Mommy! Today I went to see Snow white and the seven divorces!” .. She was completely mortified!